In Which We RUBBA DA BELLY

Season 7, Episode 1

The Memories in the Shallow Grave

If you had told me when I started watching this show halfway through season three, that four years later the first Booth and Bones scene of the season would be them making breakfast in Booth's apartment and discussing moving in together because she's pregnant with his baby, I would not have believed you for a split second.

I would have also been wrong, because,

(holy shit),

that is what the first B&B scene of the season was.

One of the most notable things we gained from this episode in regards to their relationship now is what their dynamic is now. More specifically, how it's basically exactly the same (excluding how they're more open with each other now, which I'll talk about later), just transposed into a different situation. Their discussion about her getting bigger, the first conversation we see them have this season, displays that perfectly. She's straight-forward about his kitchen being small, he responds and unknowingly opens a can of worms, she responds, and he has to back-peddle, she tries to deny his tactic in his back-peddling with science (he feels pride because of the manifestation of his virility, not attraction), and ignores it and does what his impulse tells him (in this case, to kiss her).

That pattern of conversation can be applied (plus or minus a few details) to at least one of their exchanges in every other episode. That is to say, they are still them.

Speaking of that kiss, the body language they both have in it says a lot: he turns her towards him, he initiates it (which is another strong Booth characteristic that plays a large part in their dynamic). And she responds immediately, even before he kisses her, putting her arms on his torso. Already we can see she's more open with him than before. And they kiss, twice, and she's the one who pulls away (consistent with basically everything ever in their relationship thus far), and he's still following through, with that audible breath afterward. It's clear they are both very involved and invested, but there is still that slight off-balance of his wide-open reverence of her that has been part of their dynamic for so long.

Their little conversation about marriage was... intriguing. Specifically the fact that he says “it's going to happen. I don't know when...” in regards to her asking him to marry her. I can't not at least thing of the everything happens eventually speech when I hear it. How he's so sure that it's going to happen; “all the stuff you never think happens – it happens.” How he says he doesn't know when; “Give it time, Bones.” This show loves to examine human relation to time in subtle ways. I don't have nearly enough evidence to classify it as a parallel or even a possible parallel, but I'm just saying perhaps the fact that those lines almost instantly evoked the everything happens eventually scene in my memory might not mean nothing.

When they get to the crime scene, of course, they're bickering (another huge part of their dynamic still VERY much in tact).

And she starts crying. Which I don't have much to say about except 1) I thoroughly enjoy this thing they have of taking pictures of each other in compromised positions and it shows a playful rivalry that reflects their dynamic awesomely, and 2) I'm hoping they make her blaming emotions on hormones a bit they use for awhile.

And then we have the diner scene, which REALLY reminds us that things really haven't changed – Brennan rationalizes that Booth has no say in where they live. At first, she sees nothing wrong with what she's said, because it's rational. But Booth sees is as a huge blow – to him, she's basically saying what he thinks doesn't matter. And so he responds with his line about family, and (here's where we start to see the difference in their dynamic) she acknowledges immediately that he's angry (whereas before, even at the end of last season, it might have taken her awhile to do that, and she would have pressed her point further or shut off or told Booth she didn't understand).

This is dangerous territory for them in a way – now that they'll be discussing more serious things that are very important to Booth, there's more chance for her rationalizing to result in situations like this.

The scene at the coffee cart showed them post-fight in a very different way than normal – never, really, has she ever so immediately said she was sorry, and never, really, has he been so resentful of her when she was trying to apologize. As soon as he sees her come, he moves his whole body so he's facing away from her. The look on his face as he glances back at her once he's turned most of the way is a second of true irritation with her.

Her apologizing so quickly adds up in that (considering how much they already bickered when they were just partners) if they've been spending almost all their time together the past five months, she has probably learned just from experience that the best way to end most of their arguments is just to say sorry, that often times it's not worth it to hold out just to prove she's right. Even so, she still maintains her old habits in insisting that she was correct when he says she was wrong.

His response of telling her about his research about the tribes (which we've never seen him do as a response in an argument to her before) connects back to the reason for her apologizing – they're both learning exponentially about how not only to understand each other and each other's tactics in arguments, but also to actively deal with those tactics.

She still defines her argument as rational, and he goes off on his speech about how loving her isn't rational and having the baby isn't rational but he's doing it anyway, and he goes to leave, and she knows they're still not ok about the situation but she can't just let him leave without saying something, with everything being as unresolved as it is. She feels she has to say something so she can see his response so she knows he doesn't hate her. So she says she loves him too, and he says he knows, and she's gotten the reassurance she needs, and I vomit rainbows of joy everywhere.

Anyway.

Angela bringing up Brennan being in foster care begins the conversation for the first time in the episode about why Brennan has been so hesitant to do this for reasons other than her rationalizations. Angela is right in that part of it might be her experience with her family as a child would make her scared to make a real family of her own. Ever since she was 15, she's essentially been alone. Just a year ago in Doctor in the Photo, she goes on about how she's fine alone, how it's what she knows. The degree to which has gone in and out, but for that whole time she has been alone - until now. As Angela reminds her, she'll never be alone again. To go from something you've been for over half your life to something completely different is incredibly daunting, subconsciously at the least.

So, like normal, the rationalizations are covering something up.

Two of their actions in regards to her falling more or less act as pretty accurate metaphors for how each feels about the other (and how they've basically always felt, as we've seen them do these things, except perhaps to different degrees, time and time again): 1) Booth completely flipping his shit when he gets her call about it, and 2) Brennan not thinking to call anyone but Booth.

The biggest difference with Brennan before and Brennan now in regards to rationalism/emotionalism I think is that Brennan now knows how to turn it on and off with more ease. She can flip through a very important concession with a monologue of pure rationalization (as she does with Booth and conceding that they should find a new place) still, but also can turn it off and tell Booth she loves him the next second, which is a result of her being able to better tell when it is necessary to turn the ration off and the emotion on.

Somehow, it wasn't until the very last scene, when they're lying in bed and she's talking about how she doesn't want a tv in the bedroom in their new house, that it hits me how fucking weird this is. A year ago, Booth was engaged to someone else. Now they're pregnant and finding a house together. And what really makes it weird is the fact that it feels no different ultimately than watching any other Booth/Brennan scene from before (excluding a few happy-light-fluffy feelings that come just from this being a new thing). They still have their essential dynamic – they're just more willing to share it with each other now.

Their little “new memories, new life” moment at the end totally conveys how they manage to work together even though logically it makes no sense. They both have their baggage that they're bringing to this – Booth wants to be better than his dad, Brennan is afraid of losing her family again. They both have deep-rooted, subconscious reasons for needing this to work. They both need this “new life”. As Sweets said seasons ago, Booth and Brennan complement each other. They can only have this new life with each other, because alone, they are stagnant, they are the same as they've always been. With each other, they have their complement, and they are no longer stagnant. Their lives can change, and from that, they can put their past behind them.

(It connects to the episode title too - their memories are in a shallow grave. That is to say, they've been put behind them, mostly, but it's a shallow grave, so they're still just beneath the surface and not completely put to rest.)

It was good he mentioned that they've been spending almost all their time together for the past five months, because frankly, I would have been worried if they hadn't. They've had all this damn tension and feelings and everything building up for so long that once it first finally got to start being released, they could only keep releasing it and releasing it. If you don't see someone you're in love with for a really long time, the vast majority of the time once you can see them again, you want to spend as much time as possible with them, at least for a while. This is the same kind of thing because, while they haven't been separated for months or anything, they've had these feelings bottled up for long that now that they can be released, they're finally getting to see the version of each other they've wanted to see for so long; the version that loves them and can express that openly with words and sex and gestures and whatever they feel. Like Booth said, they can have whatever life they want now.